PRELUDE: 

Without getting into too much detail, let’s just say that I see all kinds of crazy stuff in my line of work. Some of the things that come across my desk make me frustrated with society and you probably know that I blog about Fighting Fair on the Internet because of the things that I see.  In addition, sometimes the things that I see that frustrate me include others that are part of my profession. Like any profession, there are certain shit bags (okay, maybe they aren’t all shitbags…just most of them) out there that give us lawyers a bad reputation and quite frankly, it pisses me off.

Some things that I see warrant a full blog article – so I write those.  Others just warrant a short mention because I find the conduct both outrageous AND funny.  I’ve decided to start a collection of true stories, with some identifying facts modified so I don’t have to deal with the psychos, and will be continually adding more of those to the #MORONFILES for your reading pleasure:

05/31/2017 #MORONFILES ENTRY:

So here is a new one for the books.  A business client of mine is served with a third-party Subpoena Duces Tecum (fancy way of saying it’s asking for documents or things) today.  Today is May 31st – and this is important and you will see why in a minute.  Okay, standard procedure…except: 1) it’s an Amended Subpoena (never received the original subpoena); 2) allegedly issued from a state court that is in another state (so yeah, that’s not going to work – domestication pal); 3) asking for information to be provided back in the middle of April “to avoid having to make an appearance” (so, we get to time travel like Marty McFly?); 4) the said date of appearance was also scheduled for back in the middle of April (hmmm, must be banking on more of that time travel); 5) the date of said Amended Subpoena was dated back on the first of this month (so you know, the document production and/or appearance was supposed to occur BEFORE it was even signed AND the person apparently couldn’t get it served for over 30 days); 6) the Subpoena had no case number; and…oh, this is the best part… 7) WAIT FOR IT…WAIT FOR IT…when I looked up the case caption…there is no case pending with that case caption in that court!  You have got to be kidding me!?!  To top it off, right there at the bottom of this pile of crap is the name, bar number and signature of the attorney that paid to have it served upon my client.  Well alrighty then Shady McShaderson…

• 06/08/2017 – UPDATE on “Shady McShaderson” | Just when you thought that things couldn’t get any more ridiculous than what was mentioned above…when “Shady McShaderson” got called out for above mentioned antics the response back was basically that the law of the state allows for attorneys to do a subpoena without a case number.  Ummm, come again?  I’m well aware of the pre-litigation discovery process in the particular state and this is NOT in line with the procedure, pal.  I don’t care what color you paint your abuse of process turd…it’s still a stinky turd!
• 8/23/2017 – UPDATE on “Shady McShaderson” | Whoa! Shady McShaderson got a case going! So after sending a complete BS subpoena, for a case that doesn’t exist, and Shady McShaderson realized my client has ignored it, the genius counsel finally filed a case!  How did we find out? Genius counsel provided us with a case number…and only the case number. That’s it?  Come on…how much lazier and shadier can you get?  Of course such action was called out and it was explained, again, what the PROPER procedure is…  The response “no worries…”  Where do they find these people?  And how do they keep a bar license?